What Exactly Is Unfeminist About Oral Pleasure?


In a 2015 interview DJ Khaled states that he doesn’t perform oral sex on his wife but expects to receive. Why you ask? Sit tight….he claims since there are different rules for men and women….!  The man is the king, especially if he’s also the breadwinner.

“A woman should praise the man — the king,” he said. “If you holding it down for your woman I feel like the woman should praise. And a man should praise the queen. But you know, my way of praising is called, ha-ha, ‘How was dinner?’, ‘You like the house you living in? You like all them clothes you getting?”

“So, you’re saying you don’t go down?” asked the host?

“Nahhh. Never!”, “I don’t DO that” however he claims that women cannot refuse to perform oral sex on men.  Why? because “men are kings.”

“It’s different rules for men,” he explains. “You gotta understand, we the king. There’s some things that y’all might not wanna do, but it got to get done. I just can’t do what you want me to do. I just can’t.”

Khaled’s comments generated several responses, including this one by Dwayne Johnson: who sees things completely differently:

And this one by actress Evan Rachel wood who has first hand experience who questioned his decision to announce to the world that he’s a boring, mediocre “lover” lacking imagination:

Another comment that caught my eye was:  “Khaled would have been a much better rapper if his tongue was stronger”.  Many simply prefer not imaging visuals of Khaled going down on anyone….eew.

Oral pleasue dates back to the Incas, ancient Egyptians, the Kama Sutra, Pompeii and beyond. Oral definitely played and plays an important role in our sexuality, although still prohibited in some cultures.  Religion governance had lots to say, some very clear definitions were made at the time, part of the dichotomy between “decent women” and whores, one of the cornerstones of the Patriarchy, as it was considered an act performed only by whores.  Pornography later positioned it as an act of subordination, humiliating women which led to the notion that oral sex performed by women on men was a non-feminist act.  As long as it is and was consensual, it’s feminist and it’s great.  If the act is not entirely consensual and/or forceful, it’s nothing less than sexual assault.