“I still was in love with Bill at the time so I felt really responsible,” Lewinsky told A&E.
Lewinsky was a 22-year-old White House intern when her sexual relationship began with Clinton, then age 49, in November 1995. News of the affair broke in January 1998, sparking an onslaught of media attention and federal investigations.
“There was a point for me … where I would be hysterically crying and then I would just shut down,” Lewinsky says in a clip of A&E’s “The Clinton Affair” released Tuesday. “And in the shutdown period, I remember looking out the window and thinking that the only way to fix this was to kill myself, was to jump out the window.”
“I just ― I felt terrible. I was scared,” she said, breaking down in tears. “And I was mortified and afraid of what this was going to do to my family. I still was in love with Bill at the time so I felt really responsible.”